Keep asking and maybe one day youll get a sensible answer. I suggest you do a little soul searching. Do I look like someone whos into cheesy things like romantic relationships?! Sarcastic response: Express the appropriate level of enthusiasm, then let this handsome, cheeky British man (aka Jimmy from You're The Worst) do the talking: 3. Follow us on Instagram Facebook Twitter Pinterest and we promise, well be your lucky charm to a beautiful love life. #fyp #basketball #viral #fyp #viralvideo #funny #comedy". 10. 41. Try a Humorous Reply when Someone Asks "How Are You?" - All Women's Talk Tell me, how can I face my problems when the problem is my face? Just because you have a dick doesnt mean you need to act like one. I am the hurricane setting fire to the forests at night when no one else is alive or awake however you choose to see it and I live in my own flames sometimes burning too bright and too wild to make things last or handle myself or anyone else and so I run. If this doesnt cause them to reply, then maybe you should rethink your friendship with this person. If you knock on my hearts door, I might let you in. . I'm sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid. Image: wikimedia commons 6. 2. Do you have a minute? is perfect for lunch-time banter with colleagues. I text the same message ' are you alive' when I haven't heard from them in a while. They really care for you, and you better value their presence well. Save the high-quality PDF version on your device now. Unknown, "He was a great patriot, a humanitarian, a loyal friend . If I had a tail, I would wag it! 5 Foolproof Opening Texts to Amp Up Her Attraction FAST - Gotham Club How impressive! Do you like nature, despite what it did to you? 1. 45 Funny Memes About Life in 2023 - Happier Human Im quite certain that Im single because I didnt forward those chain messages stating: forward this to 10 people and you will meet the love of your life in 10 days, or else you suffer bad luck in the past. Despite not being the most popular topic of conversation, the concept of death has inspired quite a few clever and insightful sayings over the years. How dare you assume such a thing just a confusing remark. 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. Because Ive been waiting for you all my life. I have a feeling that my soulmate is somewhere out there pushing a pull door right now. Hmmph. 4. 16. I get my daily paper, look at the obituaries page and if Im not there, I carry on as usual. Patrick Moore (astronomer), He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death. HH Munro (author), My father was from Aberdeen, and a more generous man you couldnt wish to meet. If you're brain-dead, you're dead. Use them as you see fit when someone pokes their nose on your relationship status. This one is funny when you havent said anything. Check out: Image credits Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash. *sips wine/tea*. 38. I see youve chosen this time to humiliate yourself in public. People tend to ask the same questions whenever you see them, which is why you should have a few different replies to "How are you?" 25 Witty Comebacks To Use On Terrible Pick Up Lines Funny Responses to "What Are You Doing?" What does it look like I'm doing? 01 "I thought we were both adults but clearly, I was wrong. If you're really feeling them, you can give them one last chance to make up for their communication lag. Oof, gotta hide! (Act suspicious of everything and everyone!). I died last week, since then. but it's just so blunt and funny. Thats the biggest joke Ive heard recently. My standards are higher than what Ive seen lately. HubPages is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. Physically? As for me, I cant even afford honey! I hate looking at my life and seeing that some of the people that are most important to me aren't here anymore! (Say it like he or. Perhaps it will encourage them to respond quicker in the future. As anyone who knows anything about human biology will know, when a woman misses her period, that is a sign she is pregnant.if(typeof ez_ad_units!='undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,100],'grammarhow_com-box-3','ezslot_13',105,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-grammarhow_com-box-3-0'); Therefore, if she were to rely on your messages for her period, she would be pregnant by now. Maybe because I lick my plate clean after having a scrumptious meal. Should I consider that a marriage proposal from you? Hopefully he'll compliment you right back. Then they throw dirt in your face. Is It A Bad Idea To Lose My Virginity To An Old Crush? A romantic relationship would severely impair my crime-fighting order of business. 3. Could Be Payday. Thats because Im still waiting for you. My favorites were: "I'd rather have bamboo shoots shoved under my toenails." "I'd rather be in hell with both arms cut off." He was an angry, creative man. Your relationship status is your business alone (and your partners, if you have one). The next time the cat gets your tongue, heres a big list of good, witty, nasty, funny sarcastic and clever comebacks for every conversation, no matter where you are! Suppose you're about to join a group when they stop by and ask if you want to join. I'd love to give you a nasty look, but it appears you already have one. So, ditch the mechanical responses and adopt the witty and fun replies to keep the conversations exciting! If you are, then maybe were meant to be! Id love to give you a nasty look, but it appears you already have one. No one loves superheroes. There is no gray area (<brain matter joke): either you are brain-dead or you are not. 84. Your 3rd @ has one shot to make a three or you die. Furthermore, he has teaching experience from Aarhus University. Thats why Im rooting for your penis. Wondering How You Are 1 I'm Better on the inside than I Look on the outside This one works well when you're still in your pajamas or are having a bad hair day. Because no one worthy has beaten me yet in a card fight! 18. 1. It takes a specific kind of person to ghost someone its really not that hard to send a quick Im not interested text but rest assured, they exist. I always root for the little guy. alive # dead meat # tremors # kill count # survived # reaction # united states of al # dean norris # unitedstatesofal # you only live once reaction # united states of al # dean norris # unitedstatesofal # you only live once Like for your friends and close ones, here are some witty responses and replies to make them laugh, because they know exactly how you're doing and ask you as par of formality. Then I hope you find someone whos good looking, honest, smart, and cultured. My bad, its just your mouth. 2. You enjoy making this girl smile and make her day with your humor. 15. You don't need to miss them, because you are willing to travel to them, and kiss them. 18. Depends who you ask, if you ask me, it was fine. WHY!? Alexa's response: I'm sorry, Dave. 30 Funny Comebacks For Late Messages - Grammarhow I was hoping you would be able to tell me that. Just Smile And Nod No? Do you have a minute? Alive Jokes. You look tired. It might seem like a joke, but this is what I think. Its not my choice, but its still a choice. I am feeling so good that I have to sit on my hands to stop myself from clapping. Funny as phuck. My only talent is not being in a relationship. Living a life of suppressed rage, emotional imbalance, and denial. I plead the fifth. Alexa's response: No, that's not true. and our Just standing here waiting for stupid questions I guess. Sometimes, it can be hard thinking on your feet, especially when youre joking around with your friends or in the midst of a heated exchange. A little bit worse now that youve asked. "Ugh I was so lazy this week. It was also revealed that 40% of users who said they had done the ghosting did so because they simply didnt know how to explain their disinterest and felt that disappearing altogether was less hurtful. Same thing you're doing, talking to you now. Who knows, they might just do it. "It's your ego that wants to lash out," Winter tells Bustle. To answer those who know you and the situation you're going through, use these replies. 19. 101. Living the dream! Funny Answers to How Are You Doing? Get your own life first before you try sharing it. I dont follow boys/girls because theyre not my passion. Voltaire (philosopher), "As you get older, three things happen. Often, we text some people when were at rock bottom, to try and get their help, or just have someone to talk to. #19: Bumble comeback The best comeback text yet. [Read: The step-by-step guide to being a funny person and make everyone love your company]. 50. This is perhaps not for the faint-hearted. Now I have a much lower opinion of you. How are you? could be much more than a basic question, but we tend to stick to the same old, half-hearted responses. So, it might be wise to double-check theyre still alive before you complain. 60. Do you want the short or the detailed version? June 14, 2022; pros and cons of stem cell therapy for knees . funny response to are you still alive - hazrentalcenter.com 1. Sure, we all have things to do, but when someone takes two days to reply, that is a sign that they are the problem. Tip #3 - Confidence is Key. If receiving a text from your ex elicits strong negative feelings, it is best not to respond. Over The Phone or On The Phone Which is Correct? Truth is, we all have ugly experiences with our past lovers. This might be okay if they take up to 24 hours, but not more than that. Like seriously, you hoped for him to be run over by a truck or something. But half the time, it is a nightmare. Are you going to marry me? Because they are already taking their time. Not me, Im pretty depressed but thanks for asking. 20 Hilarious Things Actually Said in Court Best Life Make sure the person you say this to is able to take a joke. If someone takes a long time to reply, it can feel much longer than it is. Being single is much better than being married. Copyright 2011 - 2023 IncNut Stylecraze Private Limited. Thats because the person I like doesnt like me back. Theres this one time when a cute guy/gal asked me if I have a boyfriend/girlfriend and I said yes because I didnt hear the question. You don't want others to assume that you feel as horrible as you look, so this is the way to set them straight. Scroll down! Too early to say, it hasnt finished yet. Youre worse. I'm not Hal and we're not in space. Nice outfit. "If it looks like I give a damn, please tell me. Why is it OK for you to be an idiot, but not OK for me to point it out? At minding my own business? If someone clearly doesnt want to talk to you, the best thing to do is not talk to them. Looking for funny responses to everyday questions? He sold it to me on his deathbed. Have you met food? 2. Have a nice life." This text is excellent because you are making him or her feel guilty about ghosting you. 3. parkerbilly 3 yr. ago. still alive 810 GIFs. But, as soon as we feel better, that person no longer serves their purpose. It must have been a long, lonely journey. ", This one works well when you're still in your pajamas or are having a bad hair day. More like give me a sign that. He has six years of experience in professional communication with clients, executives, and colleagues. People will often tell you Im too busy to text you back. Im too expensive. See more ideas about maxine, bones funny, funny quotes. They used to call them jumpolines, until your mom jumped on one. 3. Is my relationship status a joke to you?! We found the best coronavirus memes about social distancing, toilet paper, homeschooling, as well as ways to spread a little more kindness. But sometimes sending a little message before excommunication can give you the confidence boost you need to dropkick them from your mind for forever. Are You Still Alive GIFs | Tenor This one is bound to get a laugh. Not even the fussiest, or clingiest person in the world would expect a dead person to reply to them. Financially? Yup, I dont share it. If you're going to be two-faced, you could at least make one of them pretty. Aeldrion 5 yr. ago. She buried three husbands and two of them were just napping." [Read: How to learn to be witty and win over everyone in the room]. I havent found anyone who matches my kinks yet. Is everything stable at your end? I had been dead for billions of years before I was born and had not suffered the slightest inconvenience. Mark Twain (author), Im not afraid to die, I just dont want to be there when it happens. Woody Allen (comedian), The leading cause of death among fashion models is falling through street grates. Dave Barry (author), Always go to other peoples funerals, otherwise they wont come to yours. Yogi Berra (baseball player), Im very pleased to be here. Well, are you? I learned my lesson. You'll be asked how you are almost every single day, which is why you should add some humor to your answers. 3. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. [Read: How to have playful banter and keep the flirting alive forever]. Of course, you don't want to brag, which is why this funny line is useful. Things You Should Know about Birth Control Pills 62 Beautiful Makeup Inspos for Girls Who Are Not Afraid to Play with Color "Like an echo asking a shadow to dance on a mirage, this one is even funnier when an ugly person says, My friend always says "gooder". Click here for additional information. Yep, thats about it just a confusing answer. You have an old soul. Funny and Clever Answers to "Why Are You Still Single?". This is a good response to throw out there. I favour the "How am I what?" 86. Better inside than outside. Its going great, really! If youre not going to say anything nice, then dont say anything at all! To contact our editors please use our contact form. Congratulations, sir. *Siri activates front camera*. 32. I mean, no matter how amazing our lives are, there's always something to complain about. Opposites attract, right? As geeky as it is, this funny response to I love you has got to make you chuckle. I am really just trying hard to avoid ambiguous questions at this moment. (What To Do), Why Do I Feel like a Roommate in My Marriage? Recognize the other person's boundaries, and try not to cross them. Maybe you can Google it. Because nowadays, the industry prefers singles over albums. Perhaps you are just such an exciting person. Watch the video: Only 1 percent of our visitors get these 3 grammar questions right 30 Best Responses To An Apology For A Late Reply. When you look at what some people have done for each other and compare it to what you expect. Search, discover and share your favorite Still Alive GIFs. Stop asking me why Im single! Liked what you just read? If this is the person youre talking to, just insure them that you are aware they are not away from their phone. Now, I understand why some animals eat their young. I'm alive, whoa! Someone took their costume way too seriously. [Read: 48 smart and sarcastic lines and quotes that kick ass!]. Youre not as bad as everyone says. I was doing great, before you came. Best "How Are You?" Answers. 8 Funny Replies To "Hahaha" Text Better Responses Oh, stop it, will you? Through humorous musings about Scalia's . For instance, a friend will be amused when you sarcastically reply, Not today, Satan! However, I need to take you back about 12 years to answer that question. Today, well look at 30 ways you can respond to a late message or reply. You don't want others to assume that you feel as horrible as you look, so this is the way to set them straight. I havent met the right one yet. 9. If there is just one valid reason for someone not replying to you, that reason would be their death. Perfect for that BRB, shower text that they never BRBd to. Everyday that you're on the right side of the grass is a good day. Oftentimes, these people just cant help but stick their noses in things they actually have no business with. 1. Youll never be even half the man your mother is. I play hard to get even if nobody is trying to get me. To answer that question, I need to take you back about 12 years. Clever comebacks not only showcase your distastethey demonstrate your intelligence, too. Read about the differences between burning alive, staying alive and being dead or alive as we explore the many ways of keeping ourselves in the land of the living. I've Tried, but No One Listens, If I Was Any Better, Vitamins Would Be Taking Me, Better than I Was a Minute Ago, Because You're Here, Okay, Because My Name Wasn't in Today's Obituaries. Listen, maybe your crush really did lose their phone. Do you really care? You don't want to be rude, but it's okay to give them a little sarcasm by using this phrase. (Use a sexy tone). Choose one of these responses to inject some life into your monotonous chats. Im still waiting for my Superman/Wonder Woman. Joshua Burns, "Death is a delightful hiding place for weary men." 90 Sarcastic Quotes for Witty Comebacks Full of Sarcasm - Quote Ambition | Are you surviving? Youre a ground-hugger. Brian OldWolf (author) from Troon on July 30, 2020: Yes, this is a very witty, funny article. They were not expecting someone so wonderful to talk to them. Giving witty and interesting responses instead of the generic Im fine is often the smartest way to kickstart a nice conversation after the greeting How Are You?. I once showed up twenty-four hours early for a date. From hair trends to relationship advice, our daily newsletter has everything you need to sound like a person whos on TikTok, even if you arent. Thats why Im single. Now that is pretty f****** funny. Otherwise, we would still be with them today. Spiritually? Who knows, maybe you can steer a conversation in a more intriguing path. What to say when your crush asks how you are? Getting into a romantic relationship with someone may seem like a good idea, but so was getting into Titanic. 37. But, if you do say it, it will highlight the problem. Nah, just kidding (though it might be true to some of you). Average, I think, that sounds about right. If your crush asks you how you are, you might as well be honest. Its good to see youre not letting education get in the way of your ignorance. The only way you'll ever get laid is if you crawl up a chicken's butt and wait. Another common excuse that younger people tend to give when they take a long time to reply is Ive been busy with uni. I only went to the gym four times instead of my usual five." Sarcastic response: "Yeah totally. Sure isnt my pay, Im still pretty broke. 88. My guardian angel be like 2. If theyre too busy to text you back, you need to be too busy to continue having them in your life, or on your social media. Tell her that you're there for her to make her laugh, if she needs some company. Hope this status quo persists for the rest of the day.". OK, so now at least you should have some idea of how to respond if your ex texts you out of the blue. While I'd love to give you the technique behind his funny comeback I can't. He may simply be one of the quickest minds in the West. Usually, people live and learn. 45. For instance, have you hooked up since you've broken up? I dont tell you how to live your life, dont tell me how to live mine thanks. 17. If ugliness was measured in bricks, I would be the Great Wall of China. Thats because theres no vacancy in my heart. It looks a little too clingy and hard to maintain. Your hair looks great! There are many other euphemisms you could use, though: Still ticking. I know youre nobodys fool, but maybe youll be adopted someday. But it can be funny. Your lips are moving, but all I hear is blah, blah, blah.. 55. Not sure why you're asking me my age. Not everybody may appreciate them. [Read: 30 foolproof pickup lines and 10 you should never ever use]. Im glad that I sleep so peacefully, knowing that Im single and aint nobody cheating on me tonight. HubPages is a registered trademark of The Arena Platform, Inc. Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners. I really thought you already knew. Your email address will not be published. Nevertheless, it can be a great approach to start a lively discussion! I just woke up like that one day. I was hoping you would be able to tell me that. I hear good things; however, you should never listen to rumors.
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